Buying time

One of the first things I thought of while still in the doctor's office was that I needed to find more time so that breakthrough technology like immunotherapy might have a chance to catch up with prostate cancer. When I looked at the results of immunotherapy trials there were some impressive results -- but not with prostate cancer. With one door closed, I had to find another.

Fortunately I've been able to find other doorways and buy time. But how I got to that point took months to figure out.

Don't rush

Given a terminal diagnosis you feel like you have to act right away. You are, literally, counting time. But I found that the rush to act isn't necessary and can lead to mistakes.

When I was told I would meet with my "team" to get our bearings straight, I thought that that would happen quickly. When it didn't I was surprised and a bit concerned. What I learned is that even with a 2-year "window" you can have time to reflect, research and think about your decisions. Given that I didn't hear anything right away, that's what I started to do.

Bleak outlook

My Urologist -- and I'm not going to give out names for obvious reasons -- made a couple of important points in our first "debriefing" following my TURP and biopsy procedure. (TURP stands for Transurethral Resection of the Prostate -- a surgery that treats urinary problems common in men with an enlarged prostates. )

One point he made that has stayed with me is that I'd be able to shrink the two enlarged nodes down to close to nothing but I'd never be able to get rid of them entirely.

Living with the cancer

My Urologist also told me that he hadn't removed my prostate. Why? Because, he said, "That won't cure you."

Everyone is different

Talking with other cancer patients has been helpful.

Another cancer patient told me that with radical changes in diet, some people have shrunk cancer tumors close to nothing, had had them stay like that for 5 or more years and then suddenly one day they were gone. Given my doctor's prediction, that may never happen and so my goal now is to die many years from now WITH prostate cancer but not from it.